Hey…

Hi there, It’s been a while, hasn’t it? Sorry about that. I’ve been juggling home schooling; lack of motivation (kids and mine!); teenage angst; occasional loneliness and, of course, the ‘nothingness’ that is my marriage (eye-roll…). I’m currently unemployed due to the pandemic but it’s given me the push I needed to completely re-think my […]

Christmas Time and Everything’s Just Fine…

I love Christmas. I love spending time with my family, seeing the children get excited over presents – I love the togetherness of it all. But in those early years I started to dread it. Initially I would speak about what we were doing for Christmas at the start of December – just so it […]

THAT CONVERSATION

It was back in September last year that I decided to bite the bullet and speak to John. There was no point dragging it out – in fact it was unfair. It was a Sunday and he had come round early in the day to get some things for his photography job. When he got […]

Framily

John and I have a mutual friend. He started out as John’s friend but has been one of the few who ‘crossed over’ and made me his friend too when John and I married. This friend – let’s call him Mark – has listened to and advised both John and me. He doesn’t judge or […]

Taking Responsibility

John started a new job the same week that lockdown was announced so he’s been on probation. We have been forced to live together through our separation although I don’t think he’s been as bothered about it as me. This week, John was told his probation has been extended for another three months. Not ideal […]

In Sickness and in Health: Part Two

I went to see John the same evening after his operation. He looked so frail and I was so pleased he was ok. I didn’t stay long but he reminded me of a list of numbers he’d written that was on his desk at home – a list of people he wanted me to tell […]

Money, Money, Money

For many years, I would (inwardly) describe John as ‘Del Boy’. For those of you not in the UK, he was a fictional character on a popular Eighties sitcom and, like Del Boy, John would always have a bright idea that was going to have the money ‘rolling in’. Usually, that meant I’d have to […]

Not Losing Myself

So, last year, after the nice evening and me agreeing to give it a go for a month – it then turned into a weird few days. It took until Thursday that week for me to feel like myself – my new self, of course. The rest of the week, I had been feeling agitated […]

CONFUSED.COM

So, around July last year, an interesting thing happened – John and I had a deep and meaningful conversation which ended positively. I am as shocked as anyone. I had spent the week being pretty pissed off with him – he hadn’t spoken to or seen the children for the whole week. I sent him […]

LOCK. IT. DOWN.

Here, in the UK we are in lockdown like much of the rest of the world. A friend said to me that at the end of this, gyms will see a surge because we will all be fatter (I can testify to that as I’ve already put on several pounds…) and there will be a […]